My Personal Faith!
The key word in the title above is "PERSONAL". All of us have faith of some sort that we have come to over our years of living in this clay body. As I look back over the last 57 years of my life in this clay body I can see the evolution of my personal faith and I think if I am here in 10 years it will continue to evolve more and more as the experiences of life changes me. All I can do in this day is describe what my personal faith looks like in the NOW of this moment.
Before I describe my personal faith let me say that I feel very strongly that where I am now in faith has very little to do with knowledge and a lot to do with experience and feeling. That’s really kind of funny when I think about how in my young years I was taught that feelings could not be trusted and if I really wanted a strong faith I must study to show myself approved unto God. Well, I did study and study and study and although I hold no degrees I also hold no fear of going toe to toe with any bible toting, bible quoting person, and yet I have absolutely NO DESIRE to do that.
Well, I’m not here today to talk about the evolution of my faith but rather to describe what my faith is NOW. So, here goes:
I believe in a perfect God who has one will and it is to SHOW US HIS UNLIMITED LIGHT. I believe that God has made NO mistakes when it comes to the journey He has set us upon. Even when we reject Him and turn away from Him I believe this is His will and remember I believe His will is to show us His unlimited LIGHT.
Paul talks about how "When the Perfect comes the partial shall be done away". The word PERFECT there means "COMPLETE". I believe Paul was talking about the time in our personal life in this clay body where we are awakened to the the PERFECT FATHER. A Father who is complete and lacks NOTHING. A Father that instills a trust within our hearts that allows us to walk in each new day with confidence regardless of what the circumstances may be because we realize that our PERFECT FATHER is the only authority and His will is ALWAYS TO FILL US WITH UNLIMITED LIGHT.
We often talk about at BG how we believe it is the FAITH of Jesus that has redeemed all of mankind. Ask yourself, "WHAT WAS HIS PERSONAL FAITH?" Was it not a FAITH in the Father’s WILL? And what is that Will? To show us His unlimited LIGHT.
John the apostle said that "Perfect Loves casts out ALL fear." God is PERFECT LOVE and as we let that perfection come alive in this clay body we will find ourselves being less and less afraid. Isn’t that what FAITH should do?
All I can do for any of you is to testify what my personal faith is doing for me. I can say that in the last two years I have faced more heartache and pain then in the previous 55 years combined and yet I have never been more at peace. We can all live in great pain and still have peace and the peace we have will be a direct result of our FAITH. I have come from a complicated system of beliefs to the simplicity of ONE THOUGHT—GOD IS PERFECT AND HIS PERFECT WILL IS TO AWAKEN US TO HIS UNLIMITED LIGHT.
This is what I repeat to myself over and over from morning to night. The wonder thing about this FAITH is that is is true whether I believe it or not. And it is also true for EVERY OTHER fellow traveler on this earth. I’m sure future experiences will sharpen this faith more and more but I really can’t see myself believing anything else at the core.
I would end with "GOD BLESS", but I don’t have to because He already has.
So glad that God has increased your faith over the years.
I hope the next years are better for you than they have been lately.
With me, I realize that the faith given to me, is actually a piece (a small one) of the faith that Jesus had in the Father.
I think a good way to put it is that we are saved by the faith OF Jesus, rather than faith IN Jesus.
Thanks!
- Steve Martin San Clemente, CA
Steve Martin, I actually think the Faith Jesus had and the faith we are all being awakened to is the exact same.
Cliff… reading this really made me think about FEELINGS. Like you my church background led me to believe feelings were to be ignored or denied, etc. Like you, in the midst of the greatest pains and troubles of my life in recent times I have found myself awakening on the inside to something I can actually FEEL: The PERSONAL, substantive, expressed essence of God. Love. Light. Peace. Fulfillment. That’s not to say that I have control over this reality. There are times that my feelings seem to distort things so I choose not to be led by them. At the same time I am not required to ignore them or deny them. I simply yield them to Father and the relational reality I am living in and inevitably I soon feel affectionately loved, even in the midst of the most difficult times. This is not something I can rationalize. Nor can I prove it. It’s something on the inside and I must yield to it, without having to run back to Scripture, or a person (minister, accountability partner, etc) every 3 minutes to make sure I’m not in heresy or delusion. I KNOW I hear His voice. I KNOW He is my Shepherd. I KNOW I am capable of being wrong – but I KNOW that He is faithful to work through anything that would get in His way of having me as His own. How delighted Father must be that we might actually want to experience and FEEL Who He is: Love. Love that isn’t just a concept but a substantive, tangible expression we were created to live within PERSONALLY.
Cliff,
I think you are right. It (the faith we have) is of the same essence. It is the one true faith of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Toby,
I like what you said about how your feelings can sometimes distort things and that you choose to not be led by them.
That is an awesome statement. I feel too many of us let our feelings get in the way of our faith.
That is why I have come to learn that the only thing I can trust for sure, absolutely, is God’s Word…in the scriptures, in preaching and teaching, and in His sacraments (baptism and holy communion). Those things are extra nos (outside of us) and they come from God and are not distorted by the emotions or sinfulness of man.
Thanks so much!
Well said Toby…..you have spoken exactly the way I feel.
Cliff, your endurance in the midst of what life has thrown at you and Nancy the last couple of years has caused me to appreciate you as a special human being. Having said that I guess I believe that the Father wills for us all to realize just how special we all are.
It seems to me that one of the greatest attributes of Jesus was that He knew who He was and was perfectly comfortable with it. No temptation could sway Him from His identity as a beloved Son and Father must long for us all to identify ourselves in the same way….beloved sons of God.
Maybe when we do we will all be willing and able to lay down our lives for one another and the world will findly know the Peace of this Perfect God of Light.
Toby wrote -’in the midst of the greatest pains and troubles of my life in recent times I have found myself awakening on the inside to something I can actually FEEL..’
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Right on Toby! The circumstances of life are being used to help shake us up, waking us up to see the futility of the world we have trusted (its value system, its ideals, and its systems), to find there is a reality within us that is rock-solid. When times are good we tend to go with them, but as soon as life deals us a blow or two, we begin to sit up and take notice. We find this life is not all its cracked up to be, its a sham and we’ve been taken in by it, – hoodwinked! It shakes up our way of thinking, so in desperation we ‘let go’! That ‘letting go’ allows the spirit within us all to be felt. Do you find this FEELING you have described is beyond your emotions? Deeper and more reliable? You have said that at times ‘my feelings seem to distort things so I choose not to be led by them’ – here are you referring to emotions – sadness, hurt, anger, suspicion etc?
Steve. You said ‘.. I have come to learn that the only thing I can trust for sure, absolutely, is God’s Word…in the scriptures, in preaching and teaching, and in His sacraments (baptism and holy communion)’
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I have found the exact opposite. There are so many different interpretations and levels of understanding, so many conflicting religions all coming from those things in your statement, so much bloodshed all in the name of God that I have to refute what you say. I think what Toby has described is the REALITY we are looking for.
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Toby says ‘I simply yield them to Father and the relational reality I am living in and inevitably I soon feel affectionately loved, even in the midst of the most difficult times. This is not something I can rationalize. Nor can I prove it. It’s something on the inside and I must yield to it, without having to run back to Scripture, or a person (minister, accountability partner, etc) every 3 minutes to make sure I’m not in heresy or delusion.I KNOW I hear His voice. I KNOW He is my Shepherd’
When I read what Toby wrote, I could feel the life within it – he has touched the same reality I experience, we share it.
Cliff- I have stated this to you, but few others. I am a retired educator, who has gone back to work full time because I wanted to. My wife, carried our load financially because of a wonderful opportunity she got with the company we both worked for. We were more than comfortable for over two years. The economic crisis, especially in our field, cause the loss of her job in Sept. She hasn’t been able to find work in here area of expertise. While she was off from a job, she decided to get her annual physical and was told she has a blockage in her heart. She is 60. Man, our Source has a way of getting our attention! That got ours. Tomorrow, we go in for the wife to have an angiogram to determine the extent of the blockage. I have decided to work as many hours as my boss will allow. I can now have the opportunity to carry the load. But, I know all will be as our Source wills. I will accept it. As Toby said,
“I simply yield them to Father and the relational reality I am living in and inevitably I soon feel affectionately loved, even in the midst of the most difficult times.”
My wife does not as yet share my beliefs. We both come from a fundamentalist, conservative Baptist background. I began my journey away from the institutional church over four years ago. She, however, is having great difficulty turning loose of it. This truly could be the event which shows her our loving Source’s goodness. her path is not my path. I simply wait until the essence of that “unlimited light” as Cliff put it, shines into her spirit. We will be fine whatever the outcome. We are loved!!
This I’ve already felt before. I know it to be true. I look forward to seeing what is in store.
Don R, I sense both your pain and your peace and please know that my very best thoughts are with you both. His unlimited light is shining into your souls every step of the way. It will be OK because it IS OK even when we don’t see it. When we open our hearts to His perfect will it is amazing how this world begins to fade and His Spirit becomes so clear. And what I love most about God is that even if we don’t open our hearts He will open them eventually.
Don, I am sorry to hear that your wife isn’t well. You both will be in my thoughts and prayers.
And this is such a difficult time economically. My plant placed our glass furnace on hold due to the down turn and I really don’t know how long I will have a job.
Best wishes to you in all regards.
Don, I hope everything goes well for you and your wife.
Great conversation going here! I want to clarify that my FEELINGS no longer take a back seat in this process – as I mistakenly thought they were supposed to for years – any more than using my arms takes a back seat to using my legs. I can’t prove this to you – but I am convinced that being made in His image, our feelings and emotions are intended to be a vital part of our being in relationship with Him.
Thank you Cliff, Steve M, Audrey, Don, and all of you for having me on board!
Cliff… YES! The faith we are being awakened to is HIS faith which so far surpasses the stuff we were calling “faith” in our well intentioned efforts to be good.
I have a lot more to add but not enough time at the moment… I’ll be back!
Don R… I wanna go where you’re both going… into a deeper reality of the Father’s loving embrace. The sufferings of these times are weighty… but this glory that is being revealed in us is incomparable. Our hearts are all with you both.
Cliff God’s love open my heart and mind to deeper today when I was voted employee of the year in my place of work just for being who He made me to be.
I thank God for awaking us all to see His wonderful love in all things in life.
Love Dan
That doesn’t suprise me at all Dan. You have always been such an encouragement to all who come here at BG. The Christ in me salutes the Christ in you.
Audrey,
Those things that I said I can trust in (for sure), all come from outside of me…from God.
The feelings that I have, or emotions, or voices in my head…may be fine. But then again, they may not be (since I am sinful and since the evil one is after me also)
Thanks Audrey!
So where do you feel love Steve? And the response to love? Don’t you feel that deep inside your heart, sometimes so powerful it feels like a dam might burst within you? By contrast that fear you have of losing your job comes from outside and is fed by imagining thoughts of what consequences there might be as a result. All this is in your head and if you take hold of those thoughts, they will affect your body making you sick. Those thoughts you have of being sinful and an evil one after you are all in your head, fed by religion that puts a God in the sky. Your heart wont ever tell you that. Your heart tells you that you are loved, you are unique, that every hair of your head is counted, that the spirit within you cares for you every step that you take, and he is watching you every moment, waiting for you to discover as Toby has, that he is within you and will never leave you.
I love the simplicity of the Good News / unconditional love / The Kingdom… In comparison I hate what religion did to me and what it does in general. It really messes up our heads and leaves us with a fear and doubt orientation. But somehow it’s there (religion) and in a weird way I do appreciate it – for when you finally begin to surrender to the reality of “Christ in you, the hope of glory” religion becomes a dismal dark background to the vibrancy of His UNLIMITED LIGHT and LOVE being released on the inside. Religion is EXTERNAL but relationship/intimacy is WITHIN. This contrast becomes more and more distinct for me. Yes, I do respect symbolic sacraments such as those that Steve was talking about. But I do not ‘trust’ in external symbols any more than I ‘trust’ in my marriage certificate between me and my wife. That thing is filed away who-knows-where; probably faded and tattered. I give my affection and attention and trust only to her (except sometimes when the TV remote is in my hand, etc… hopefully you get my drift!).
Toby – I like the example you give of the difference between a written document that is ink on paper, and the reality of the relationship that you and your wife have, because this is exactly what we experience as we turn from our head-knowledge (our old mind-set), to our hearts (metanoia). It is impossible to have a relationship with a God in the sky. That one is a figment of our imagination. The REAL one dwells within us and will lead us into all truth, teaching us moment by moment through the circumstances of life, revealing Himself through those deep FEELINGS of love, joy hope and peace. His desire for us is to experience this close relationship first-hand, not just read about it through ink on paper in scripture. Not any more through symbolic rituals and keeping of days, but through a personal relationship that is even closer than the love between husband and wife. Right now, He is the bridegroom inviting us into this love that will change the world, that will enable all the wrongs to be righted, the hungry to be fed and the world released from bondage. If you have ’seen’ any of this, then the promise is to you, because He says that this generation will NOT pass away until it is fulfilled.
Audrey… I’ll have what YOUR having!
Audrey, I’m jazzed with the vibrancy and expectancy you exude here – it really resonates with me! I’m also grateful for others here that might not share our passion entirely. We’re all flowing through diverse mindsets, seeing through a variety of perspectives and life experiences and there’s something to be treasured in all of these! Thank you Cliff and all for including me / tolerating me in these conversations
Our Source is good. The wife got as good a report as possible. 40% blockage in one small artery. Diet change and exercise are prescribed. Thanks to all for your thoughts. The LIGHT is shining through.
Great news, Don!
I came across the words to a hymn today that really spoke to the way I feel about life…
No man is an island,
No man stands alone,
Each man’s joy is joy to me,
Each man’s grief is my own.
We need one another,
So I will defend
Each man as my brother,
Each man as my friend.
["No Man Is an Island," words and music by Joan Whitney and Alex Kramer, 1950]
Wow, Bruce. I learned that song in middle school chorus class (1974?)… there’s a flashback! Those lyrics are so rich and relevant, but I really didn’t grasp them way back then the way I do now (and want to even more). In a word: compassion. We can never have too much of that, can we?