Are you Listening?
This past week was filled with so many great conversations that I have been reminded of a post that my Father did February 11, 2009 called: What Keeps Us From Seeing Clearly. For my Father he wrote that "SEEING MORE CLEARLY has been a result of a lot less talking" and one of the things that I will carry with me from that post was when he wrote, "It feels so peaceful to know that my contribution is not nearly as important as my observation."–Cliff Hazelbaker
One of the things I have been learning this past week is that the most important thing I can do for myself and for others is to listen. I don’t have to agree with what someone says and I do not have to convince anyone that I am right, but in order to see another humans spirit which I believe to be the spirit of God then I do need to listen and when we listen we tend to see more clearly.
I believe that our spiritual form is destine to share ourselves with each other, but our earthly form wants to control what is shared. When we let go of the control we find peace.
I believe that once the spirit is awakened the flesh begins to die. I saw my Father take his last breath, but I am seeing my Father’s spirit live on through my Family. Once we start to acknowledge the innerself (spirit) we find ourselves on a journey of self discovery. The flesh begins to get weaker and weaker, but the innerself, the soul, the spirit becomes child like again. Children listen. They take in as much as they can. At some point the world starts to cloud their vision and the listening becomes more difficult. We end up giving in to the world and hiding who we really are. We become so afraid, so defensive and so judgemental that we begin to talk rather than listen.
So, are you really listening? Are you hearing the birds singing sweetly in the trees? Are you really listening when your child speaks to you? Or are you hearing what the world is telling you?
Not quite listening, but I think I hear a Whisper.
I listen to other people, and then I get so many conflicting view points, it leaves me totally confused!
TitforTat,
I liked that
Julia,
You are so right. It is extremely chaotic to hear anything when the entire world is coming at you with a million different peceptions, but keep in mind that what you are trying to attain is your own perception and you get there with an open heart and an open mind and remember that we are all on the same journey. We may be taking different paths, but all roads lead to a God of Love. Julia, you are here on BoldGrace…listening…already with an open mind and an open heart.
About two years ago I ran acrosss an audio tape of my oldest son who is now 14 years old. At the time of the audio tape he was about 2 years old. When I listened to that tape it made me really sad, because I never realized how well he could talk at that age. I missed his attempts to communicate…to really hear his words. I didn’t really listen.
Now I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. I am also a teacher. Our world gets very busy. Things do come at us a thousand miles a minute, but Mindy is right. We need to listen. What are we gaining by not listening? What are we really missing? How are we growing?
The day I listened to my son’s audio tape was the day I became a better listener. I now see more clearly. I now have had the opportunity to see and appreciate more human spirits and I am thankful for that sweet little voice that helped me learn this.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and reminding us to see more clearly!
Michelle,
LOL and I am not the one wearing them!! It seems so simple!! BUT, I know that it isn’t. This may have only seemed like an easy example to all of you, but for me and Abby it was a wonderful step in our journey together that she will remember for a lifetime all because I took the time to listen.
You said, “I missed his attempts to communicate…to really hear his words. I didn’t really listen.” –EXACTLY
Well said Michelle…and I hear ya girlfriend!
I have a 9 year old little girl who is trying to find her way in this world. She is trying to become her own and sometimes I will find myself not really listening to her. I will find myself stopping her without realizing that is what I am doing. We went shopping for tennis shoes last night and for the first time in this type of situation with her I did not try to control her. She saw the pair she liked. I didn’t 2nd guess her. We had agreed on a price that I was able to pay. They were less money, she tried them on, they fit, she smiled and I said “lets get them.” AND for the first time I had opened my eyes to my daughter. I did not argue that I didn’t think they were cute because for the first time I could see with her eyes and what I would normally think wasn’t cute…was adorable!! They fit her personality, they will be easier to clean
“Be still and know that I AM”
Thanks so much for this reminder to listen. It’s certainly one of the places where I feel I fell short with my kids especially and not to beat myself or anyone up but just to recognize the huge importance of this is a good thing. I do try today to make it a top priority in all my relationships and it has and does make a difference.
Hey mindy, I hope this isn’t taking us off topic but you said that all roads lead to a God of love and I think that I do understand what you are saying but feel there are some that would disagree with that or not understand and might think that there are some roads that do not lead to God. I just thought it might be an interesting discussion if you’d like and if not thats okay too.
I would love to Lisa! I just don’t have any proof, but I can say for certain that I believe that love is the source of energy from which we came from and will go back to. I also believe as my Father did that God is Love. It is the shortest verse in the bible and the easiest to understand. I have tried before to just live, but I was never able to do it with anger for very long. I was never able to do it with fear for very long. Their is something in my being that I have no control over and that is to feel love for others. I have tried not to…trust me on that one, but I have never been able to do and when I would try my life was awful, miserable and sad and so I prefer to believe in a source of love because it is so easy to do. Even when I am hurt by the world I can always find the love somewhere.
The beauty of the five senses God gave us is immeasurable. The ability to hear is great, the ability to listen is greater. The wondrous sound of a birds song is joy you’ll never forget , but to hear the “cry for love”, in the gut wrenching sound of an angry voice screaming, can only be heard if you listen.
Lisa,
!! – I’m not necessarily saying I have embraced Geo’s view expressed yet but the post stuck in my mind and I’ve always remembered it.
Somewhere in the blog archives here there is a post by Geo called “one road, many modes”. Because I have so many conflicting view points clashing around in my head – FROM LISTENING
Try and find it. Do you know how to show her that post, Geo?
Love from
Julia
Thanks guys and believe me I DO hear you and know what you’re saying and feel the same way.
Doug, I love what you said about the “cry for love” . That was just beautiful and so true and when we approach everyone that way it makes such a differnece to us and to them. It’s amazing. I love that I have all of you all to encourage me. There are so many out in the world that want to convince me of a different way and for some reason the only one that EVER made any sense to me at all was LOVE IS THE GREATEST, GOD IS LOVE, and of course, LOVE NEVER FAILS.
Julie, I think I might remember that and will try to look it up. I know what you mean about the conflicting view points. I’m still trying to sort it all out and like I said, I just always come back to, “It’s about Love” It is still the only thing that ever makes any sense to me. I guess where I’m at on the “all roads lead to God” is I’m still not convinced that there might be some road that is just evil and hate and not from God because it is not love so I’m still trying to understand how that can be from or lead to God. That probably makes no sense but anyway I appreciate you all!
Lisa,
In my heart I know we are all on the same journey. That is what my eyes see. I see that different circumstances may lead us down different paths, but we all die and I simply know in my heart that the God I believe in is a loving God who will be with me on my journey and along the paths that I take. I believe that I don’t have to follow the same path as everyone else. I am going to take my own…I am CLiff’s daughter what more can I say??…it never felt right to me to believe in a GOd that would send ANY human to some sort of hell filled with fire and pain and suffering. I simply cannot live in this life believing that. Pain is self inflicted.
Thanks Mindy! I found Geo’s article and I agree with it. I do believe that loving Buddhist, Muslims and etc are just on a different path then me. I agree with Cliff in that Christ and love are the same thing so I certainly disagree with lots of my “christian” friends that one must believe the same way they do. We’re all at different places on our journey and I so appreciate your sharing where you are. I’m still struggling with what does happen with the “evil”, the unolving, and I just don’t know. Don’t know if any of us know for certain exactly how God works all this out. I know what you mean about hell and like I said, I’m still seeking and searching. Thanks for sharing.
Lisa,
You are amazing and I can’t thank you enough for allowing me to share with you. Some people absolutely can’t stand the thought of sharing thoughts with each other for fear they may be lead astray, but noone can lead me anywhere unless I follow them. In the beginning God said to Adam and Eve that they are good. They are perfect. They are exactly the way they were made to be, but God had one request and that was to stay away from the tree of Knowledge of good and evil. I perceive that to mean that God wanted them to stay away from the places that would try and teach them that their are such things as good and bad and that if they go there then they will never look at themselves the same. They would be taught by something else that they are not good enough and then see themselves that way, but God made us perfect and we do not need to see ourselves as imperfect. But I believe that because Adam and Eve went to the tree of knowledge of good and evil we teach each other to see imperfections in each other. The Church is what teaches us to see ourselves as sinners they teach people that they will never be good enough for God so we live in fear just as Adam and Eve did because they were tempted, but God does not see us the way we see each other. To him I am exactly the way he designed me to be. Love will not fail me, but I am capable of failing Love.
The people who go to Church are wonderful, amazing, loving and thoughtful people. The things that they do for others can be so great, but the contradiction that is their doesn’t work for me. I can talk the talk and not walk the walk. It isn’t in our DNA to live as a contradiction forever. Eventually we will all see each other the way God does…maybe it happens while we are taking our last breath.
Thanks Mindy! That really makes a lot of sense to me about Adam and Eve and that damn tree!
If only……
This morning the thought came to me that maybe what God will destroy will be the evil in all of us. That it is the evil that will be no more eventually, that when God gets through with us we will all be loving compassionate souls as He intended from the very beginning. Like I said, I don’t know but I love talking to folks with all different view points. I’ve always said thats where we can learn and grow, not just from hearing our own pov’s over and over. Right?
Absolutely!!! Archeologist can dig. Scientists can test and research, but one fact remains and that is NOONE knows what happens when we die so why not live in a way that makes you truly happy…not temporarily happy like a drug gives you, but a happiness that gets you up and moving in the morning. The kind of happiness that causes you to smile at the stranger next to you in line getting their coffee. The kind of happiness you get when you go see an old friend that you thought you would never see again. The kind of happiness that makes you want to kiss your mate when they come home from work. The kind of happiness that makes you feel good all of the time because you are free to think and feel the way you want to. It isn’t always sunshine and roses…I know this, but we can’t let the world get the best of us. Give the best to yourself.
I call that abundunt joy and imo, can only be found when love has cast out all fear!
“The kind of happiness that causes you to smile at the stranger next to you in line getting their coffee. The kind of happiness you get when you go see an old friend that you thought you would never see again. The kind of happiness that makes you want to kiss your mate when they come home from work. The kind of happiness that makes you feel good all of the time because you are free to think and feel the way you want to. ”
This is great Mindy, this is the kind of happiness I want!! I love your posts. My biggest regret right now is not listening to your dad with an open heart and mind, I think deep down I was hearing him and I knew what he was saying was the truth but something was keeping me from really listening. The “church” made me so afraid to believe him and I would give anything to just sit and listen to him for hours now……… Regrets……..I know it doesn’t do any good to have them. I’m so thankful that you are carrying on in his footsteps. I check this site everyday hoping for something knew from you. You don’t know how much it means to me. I love you!
Mandy, you have nothing to regret, your Uncle Cliff once told me that he new you heard him and that it was just a matter of time. No body can exist in an atmosphere that makes you afraid to believe in a Loving God. He would be so proud of you for facing your fears, and allowing yourself to listen , learn and grow. There is no sweeter kinder more beautiful person on this earth then you are, you have nothing to fear.
Mandy,
I agree with Doug…you have nothing to regret. We seem to always be the last ones to notice the good in ourselves. Church can do alot of things, but the one thing they can’t do is take away something that God gave you. Never live with regrets. Just learn and move forward. Don’t be afraid of who you are. The more you let go of fear the more open your heart and mind will be and eventually you will find your own answers all on your own. You have awaken a slumbering Christ that has been living within you. Your spirit has been ready to soar. Promise me you will not live with regrets. You are right…it will not do you any good. I love you so much.
This is so cool! Mandy, I don’t know you as well as doug and mindy but I can tell by your honest sharing that you have such a sweet spirit. Evidently you WERE listening to Cliff with an open heart and mind or you wouldn’t be open to it now. Its okay to be cautious to some degree. Just know that ALL who seek WILL find and thats exactly what you are doing now! Your end belief may vary some from Cliffs, mindys, mine and anybodys for that matter for we are all different and special and thats what makes it so GREAT! And, why its good to listen and learn from everyone we meet. Some of my greatest lessons have been from folks I never in a million years would have thought they might actually have an answer for me.
Remember if God used a donkey, he can even use me!
Cliff began his journey to serve Christ as a young man. For most of his life his only resources to answer the questions that he had was his bible, those in his congregation, a few special mentor, and his family on Saturday night.
Many of his question he soon learned must be held silently in his heart out of fear of being rejected by those he believe to be his “church family”. His journey to server God continued down a path of well laid traps of organized religion, traps of guilt , traps of fear, traps rejection. He continued down this path with one hand holding on to organized religion and the other in the hand of a God of love till he realize he must release one. There was no question in his mind which hand he would release at that fork in the road, and he never looked back.
The advantages of the youth of today are emense. Cliff for bigger part of his journey didn’t have the tools available today , such as computers and cell phones. I know that Cliff would want you to enjoy your journey. To have fun with it , never fear, and to remember that is a perfect process.
If i recall correctly his words to Mindy were, “IT’S SIMPLE MINDY”.
Love never fails
I have been on many journeys in my life and just recently i thought I was going to start one on my own without my husband. I had secrets and guilt and my soul was trapped. My spirit clouded and I could’nt see clearly. My family was my sounding board but in the end it was the very man, I was leaving that set me free. He said Iam guiltless, faultless and perfect. The forgiveness and unconditional love and the words he expressed,which came from listening and hearing my father, was the beginning of my true journey. I AM FREE! I now what it means to truly feel forgiven and not just by my husband but God. I know that through all of it, if I didn’t have God in my life that I would never feel forgiven for anything I do. I now miss my dad more than ever because when I free’d myself from it all I wanted talk to my dad. I feel Iam mourning him all over again but I thank him for being strong enough to leave all of us and know that whatever journey we are taking, he knew we would be ok. I am who I am and I love me, all of me.
I want to thank my sister Mindy for dropping her life in my time of need. i want to thank my brother Cliff,sister Amy and my mother for their uncondtional love. Uncle Andy and Uncle Doud, what can I say but I wish everyone had uncles like mine! I would need all day to thank everyone in my life and boy, what a blessing to have so many that I don’t have time to list them.
One thing I appreciated about Cliff was that he didn’t demand that you come to all the same conclusions he did. He felt it important to express his opinions, based on his study and life experience, but was also willing to listen respectfully to opposing views. And, I never felt that my relationship with him depended on my agreeing with him on everything. So often this is not the case! Many times people just aren’t okay with differences of opinion. I’ve found this to be equally true both in “organized religion” and outside of it.