“I have realized that there is more my soul has to share”
"It is always raining in my head." I just heard that in a song called Epiphony by Staind. And it is always raining in my head!!!! Those words are so true!!! Just when you think you are starting to treck further into the cave you hear or see something that brings you back out and it made me filter something that Doug commented about when he wrote, "I keep thinking that there will be a point that I have shared all that my heart has to give". This made me realize that when this point in my journey starts to become easier to travel I will always find more to share from my heart. This is a journey that will go on forever because it will go on in the hearts of those that I have left behind just as my Father has done through us. Though he cannot physically write from his heart he left a piece of it in all of us and we will continue to write for him. Our journies may take us down different roads. Those roads will be hard and they may be easy it just depends on where we let life take us, but through these journies we will always have something to share.
I can remember a time as a younger woman going to Church every Sunday and listening to my Father speak to the congregation. Even though the setting was annoying his words always shot straight to my heart because he was real and he shared his truth. I have always been drawn to those that are real even when I wasn’t being real with myself. IT doesn’t get better than when people share their truths with you. We have to be willing to hear the feelings and trust how it touches us. Some people can talk a mile a minute about what they believe is the truth, but the reality is that the truth is within each and every one of us. Filter what you are hearing and listen to YOUR voice from within? Can you even begin to touch the feelings that arise from within you? Some believe that feelings can’t be touched, but for me they can. When I held my Father’s hand while he took his last breath I touched them.
You may not live to see tomorrow, but are you living today? YOU are the truth. I realize life is a struggle. Finding happiness for yourself in a world of illusions is so diffucult. I am going through it now, but don’t give up on yourself. Don’t settle for what others think is your happiness. Search, listen, study others and allow yourself the emotions that your soul is desperately trying to get out of you. You can’t stop the pain, you can’t control the happiness you feel. You are a soul made up of feelings that make you who you are. We all have that in common. It is a universal language that we try to deny by color, race, sexual orientation or whatever, but the reality is that we are all connected. It isn’t a connection from the surface, but from a place deep within that most are afraid of. Some of us are just connected more to each other and that is when we fall in love or find friendships that last forever. Keep the ones close to you that try to understand who you are and love and accept you for that.
Don’t ever think that you don’t have anything to share. It may be hard to get the words out, but when you find those that want to hear you and you share more of who you are you’ll become more free to be the perfect child that God made you to be.
OMG, BG You are the shit, you are the fuckin shit, that he was telling you… OMG BG YOU felt it you know it. I am dancing with you kid and so is your daddy.
omg i love you so much . i love YOU SO MUCH
I wont hold you bg with a moment of the truth you felt in your words. I know how fleeting the love you feel is. You said so many thing from your heart, that your mind wont recognize tomorrow, but you heart will.
Mindy said: This is a journey that will go on forever because it will go on in the hearts of those that I have left behind just as my Father has done through us.
Mindy said: You can’t stop the pain, you can’t control the happiness you feel. You are a soul made up of feelings that make you who you are.
Mindy said: Some people can talk a mile a minute about what they believe is the truth, but the reality is that the truth is within each and every one of us.
Mindy said: It isn’t a connection from the surface, but from a place deep within that most are afraid of.
you wont remember the truth of your heart tomorrow, not because it wont still be there BG, but because the mind that you trust will take you away, so i have highlighted the truth of your heart tonight.
read your own words over and over like i did Audrey’s.
I love a baby girl that farts when she laughs
love uncle Doug
MC WANTS TO SAY; Humans are all screwed up, if they would start by licking there ass, they would come closer to kissing there heart.
gezz can you kill a cat with a bee bee gun?
Dam cat
The beauty of a violet will Lay silent beneath the grass you walk on, till you touch its heart, then it will explode with the love of MINDY.
LOVE
I AM JUST DANCIN AROUND WITH THE LOVE OF YOUR DADDY.. OH MY
OMG,,, I DONT HAVE CRAP TO SAY NOW.. im just feelin so good, i got my sis dancin for the love of her life, and i got a little dip shit feelin the love in her heart, and im feeling pleased…..im fuckin wantin ice cream…do you feel his smerky ass with you bitches, you walked to the center of that dance floor, and we are lovin it.
dance dance dance till the sun drys your eyes… its not over till we meet again
love the moment
My last thought will be of the beauty of innocent hearts.
The desire of love that Begin’s with your first heartbeat, but it may never be felt till your last one… the need of love that was felt with your first breath, but might not be felt till your last one….the wonder of love that will be with you from your first thought, but might not be known till your last one.
My last thought will be of the truth of love that will be felt in you with ever heartbeat from the moment of conception to the end of time, the silent beauty of innocent love with head bowed to your beauty, hair shrouding the love of your life, as you watch him stand in the center of your dance floor waiting for you as all snicker and laugh, and still he will waits…..for you
love doug
I have began to watch mankind with eyes that i have never looked throw before. I have began to feel mankind with a heart i did know. I began to hear mankind with ears that i never had. i began to touch mankind with hands that ive never felt.
I walk on bare feet in pebbles of pain, i cried rivers of tears, i screamed with the anger of despair , i begged for the darkness of night to show me the light, i dammed the reasons for my pain and then i meet an angel that showed me a path to step on a mountain of love, into the heart of truth.
love u Audrey
After my mom died, my husband warned both my sister, Linda and I of post-traumatice stress and to look for the signs and when we were together at Thanksgiving, she thanked him for that saying she never really thought of it like that but it was very traumatic. What mom wen through, what we went through having to witness this lovely, precious sweet woman go through so much and us oourselves feeling so very powerless about it all. And then I think about the words you have written doug, I met an angel that showed me a path to step on a mountain of love, into the heart of truth. I believe my mom was that angel for me. She showed love and no fear and like a therapist said since we weren’t able to walk with her into the valley of death but we were there to help her walk into the light even if we weren’t there that very last breath. My struggle now is working through what I did not get, which was to be there at the very, very end. I was there 12 hours earlier but had gone home. No one told us this was the end. Suppose no one knew. I still blame myself and say I should have known, why didnlt I know, why didn’t God tell me, why didn’t the nurses tell me and I realize this is mental masturbation and I hope and pray it passes soon for the most part I do remain forgiving and grateful but every once in a while that core Lisa, the one that hasnt’t tapped into the love comes out and wants to blame and waller in self pity. I suppose thats okay for a spell but I do believe for myself and those I love, its time to move on or maybe not. Guess I’ll just trust God and His time.
I love this web site and all you people for just letting me share whatever!
Lisa P
Well spoken, Mindy!
In her post Mindy wrote “the reality is that the truth is within each and every one of us. Filter what you are hearing and listen to YOUR voice from within? Can you even begin to touch the feelings that arise from within you?”
‘
What a great question. There must be many out there who felt an urge to share their own experience of an illuminating moment where the feeling inside was of being enveloped in love, or an experience such as a little child trustingly taking your hand. Sharing these experiences allows you to re-live them and learn something of the truth hidden within you that Mindy spoke of. I for one would love to hear your stories and I’m sure speaking them out will attract others to do the same. We need each other to learn what is written on our own hearts.
.
Doug. An angel is simply a messenger speaking from the heart - I have been touched by the simplicity of the truth spoken through you, and all I want to do is to encourage you to continue going deeper, sharing from your heart, even if you feel only MC is listening! That takes guts and determination, but look ahead - there’s a whole new vista opening up where all things are possible. We are only just becoming accustomed to the light our new eyes are seeing, as a baby does in it’s first weeks. But oh the joy in that first response when the little one smiles! We are just there, learning to open up to this new dimension, slowly getting rid of the old thought patterns we’ve been hooked into and giving way to that real life within. Let’s continue, casting aside all the stuff that inhibits our growth and prevents us from speaking out. Let’s go together into a NEW LAND. Who is willing to come?
Lisa, the comfort and ‘lifting-up’ from sorrow and heartache, regret and pain is a heart-beat away. It is WITHIN YOU> Just go there and relax in the armchair of love. There is no god outside of you that is going to meet your need. That is a made-up figment of man’s imagination, so don’t even think something imagined can help you through this valley. But the REALITY is that it has all been provided IN YOUR HEART from the moment of time. You are carrying the comforter around with you, but looking in the wrong direction. He’s not OUTSIDE, he’s INSIDE YOU. Reach in and meet him.
Dear sweet Lisa, I believe as we walk though life our minds can be like a backpack, and we just keep putting our regrets, our sorrows, our grief, our guilt in it till our legs cant carry the weight of it all any longer, and it is at that point that we look within ourselves for truth of life. As we begin to feel the love the beauty the joy the peace within us our backpack are cut open like the bottom of a bag of sand leaving us free to feel the love within.
Audrey.. I am sooo ready to walk with you into that NEW LAND!
LOVE ALWAYS
Me too, Doug, ready to walk into that NEW LAND! I do understandy what you are saying Audrey and I do believe with all my heart that it is inside of me but, I still chooses to see it as a higher power greater than myself. I believe that what has been provided is from God and its not the same understanding of God I had as a child. I don’t know. I always love what you have to say and have learned a lot from you and I think the growth is from listening and learning from each other with our different view points than just hanging around others who believe exactly as I do, (as if I could really find someone who believes EXACTLY as I do :)) Love you guys, thanks for the lift!
I love this qoute Lisa, it to me is what this site is all about.
“It is just that we should be grateful, not only to those with whose views we may agree, but also to those who have expressed more superficial views; for these also contributed something, by developing before us the powers of thought”.
Aristotle
Love Doug
LOVE that quote! Thanks so much for sharing! I use to not want to listen to someone who had a different belief system than mine but now, I cling to it, hoping to learn and grow and understand. I know that Audrey is just taking me deeper than where I am now and I’m loving it and appreciate her for it.
Also, don’t you think, sometimes folks can be saying closer to the same thing than what they might think but just in a different way? That and of course, the blind men and the elephant story. It’s only when all the views can be pieced together that we really have a clear view.
Thanks for the love grace and mercy!
I’ve been so self absorbed as of late that I didn’t take the time to really read what Mindy wrote in this piece. I just went back and read and re-read and it is beautiful and I thank you for it. I can so relate to being in church and none of it really making since but when daddy got up there to peach, I could always tell when it was REALLY from the heart and those are the times it pierced mine. Preachers back in the day had to “play the game” at times and neither of our dads really did that very well. I think it is because they did KNOW that it is a heart condition and it is all about love. My dad was very hurt by “church” people over the years as was yours and its hard to make sense of that at times. It is about being real, about sharing the truths within ourselves and not pretending in any way to be something we’re not. That’s freedom for me.
I’m with you Ms P.
I LOVE THE POWER OF GUILT. My brother Cliff was the best at it, but Andy an I weren’t to bad at it either. Within a word or two Cliff could make you want to by his breakfast or give him your most treasured position. I saw him once get my brother Andy so flustered in his guilt that instead of saying to Cliff “Kiss my ass” it came stuttering out of Andy’s mouth” Don’t kiss my ass”! So from that day in my family instead of saying Kiss my ass, we say Don’t kiss my ass.
Today my brother ask me to help him with the Christmas lights on the big blue spruce tree that we all stand around on Christmas eve and hold hands as we sing.
As we finished Andy, Tess, and I stood and look at the tree for a moment thinking of the beauty of the love it has offered all of us.
In that moment of bliss, I said “hey guys I’m outta here, see yah later”,as I turned and began to walk away i got about three steps and i heard Andy say “YAH ill see yah Doug, and dont worry about that ladder ill take care of putting it away”… Dam his bony ass he got me with guilt. As i spun on my heal to get that darn ladder i said to him, “The only joy i find in ur bony ass, is that you remind me of that dam little brother of mine”!
Can the face and the power of guilt, hate, anger, despair, pain, confusion, be spun around on its heal to reveal the face and the power of love? Dam right it can.
Don’t kiss my ass…
love DOUG
As my travels take me down this path of Genesis my mind wonders what did God need me for. Did he want some monkeys in a zoo? Did his ego need me to pump it up? What could a God that is perfect need?
Could it be that he had no needs, but he had a desire to not be alone, so he created us and offered us a ways to feel him? He didn’t need us he just wanted us.
Our relationship with God is not like a relationship we have with our auto mechanic or our colleagues in business, that once your needs are meet the relationship is over. It is like the ones we have with those that we simply want to feel because you have chosen to feel them, it is not a relationship for what they offer, but for what they are, and its a love that lasts forever.
love always
MC SAYS: He would rather eat the tails of a thousand mice sauteed in rotting lizard tongues, then to lick the peel of one apple from the tree of knowledge.
I’m buying a dingo, i think they eat cats..
Dam cat
The wisdom of Gods love was nailed in our hearts with every blow of the hammer on that cross.
Love always
This is for my BG3. IT IS THE TRUTH OF LOVE AS I SEE IT.
If the one YOU love could no longer provide you with your NEEDS, would you still love them if they loved you? To my love I say a resounding YES.
LOVE DOUG
Sometimes I think children as they grow older see there parents like we do God. We go to him when we dont think there is anywhere else to go. He tries all through your life to offer you the truth of life you need, as we do as parents, he gives you examples, as parents do. He tells you of his unconditional love, and he sits quietly wringing his hands when he knows your in pain, waiting on you to let his love wrap its arms around you,but children dont feel the PAIN of there parents, they dont feel the pain of there hearts, they leave them siting wring there hand, knowing they will always be there for them.
ITS A BADGE OF HONOR, that parents wear proudly.
love the truth
And parents are the MASTERS of guilt… lol love you BG3
OMG THAT WAS GOOD
dont kiss my ass
Today I had to go back to IU Medical Center where we were just 8 months ago with my Dad. Walking into that building brought back so many memories for me. Some good and some bad. So many emotions running through me, but Jesus helped me bring forth the strongest of emotions and that was courage. I held back the tears all day so that I could be my husbands strength. His mother was there for the removal of a tumor that needed looked into. The surgery went well and so far so good. The tumor is cancer free, but the ovary is still being looked at. When she woke up she grabbed her baby boy (my Charlie) and they hugged each other in that beautiful mother son love to let each other know that they mean more to each other than this fear of Cancer. It made me think of My Grandma and my Dad and the what if’s. That beautiful love the Mother has for her son and the strength her son has for his Mother. It is the most incredible miracle to be a part of and once again I am there witnessing it. How lucky am I?
I don’t know where all roads will lead, but during the travel one thing is for sure LOVE NEVER FAILS US!!
the moments of courage the tender truth of the beauty between a mother and a son was not the greatest emotion Jesus let you feel, it was love.
uncle Doug
There is a part of me that can go far from were my heart wants me to be. It only takes the swollen eyes of my brother on any morning to send me places i dont want to be. I can explode with the mind of hate that is beyond the reason of truth, and hurt all in its way.
The love my mind has for family goes beyond the reason of my heart, and allows the angry angels of hate to still walk with me. Even when the ones I love hurt the ones i love, i become angry. The love my mind has for family goes beyond reason.
I believe the truth in my heart will temper the confusion in my mind.
love the truth
MC SAY: Its better to abandon a basket of kittens then to share the heart of one lark with them if they cant feel the beauty of its flight.
OMG, HES SNIFFIN GAS IN MY TRACTOR,,, ITS REALLY HARD TO LOVE HIM
DAM CAT
dO YOU KNOW THE DIFFERANCE BE TWEEN WALKIN free and and walkin alone?… i doubt it
do you wanta know?
i doubt it
ill tell you when the right one ask me
love Doug
I love my little aussie angel, but here are her words to me.
I have been touched by the simplicity of the truth spoken through you, and all I want to do is to encourage you to continue going deeper, sharing from your heart, even if you feel only MC is listening!
Your so sweet Audrey, you do feel me, as i do you, and we will walk together into the new land, but there is a point when the simplicity of my heart is not even felt by MC, there is a time when i wont feel that I’m touching anyone but myself.
I will always be a simple person, with a simple truth, that maybe simply doesn’t want to be heard.
I’m not going to share it tonight because my eyes are a bit to crossed, but I’m going to share a truth of philosophy that will help u see that even the most brilliant minds can get it wrong, its not in your mind, there is no answers there.
more to come
love Doug
MC SAY: I can love a cat hateing dingo if my master dose.
I hate that cat, hes to smart for me.
Dam cat
As your mind walks you through this life it will slip and slide till it falls on your heart.
love always
my last thought will be for bg3, you think your gonna dance it alone, you think your gonna wiggle it your way, you think no one can see though your window.
Your little bony ass dont know that most of the ones you wont let touch you have stood in front of your window.
There was a reason that uncle Doug made you the angel of secret day.
love my angels
Some folks may lust after being called angel of secret day. Me, I’m lusting after being called bony ass
Why doesn’t anyone lust after being the one that farts when she laughs?? Well, the truth is that I don’t just laugh when I fart, but I have become the master of lighting flames out of my ass…beat that one MC!
Lisa,
(you bony little ass) you are in my thoughts tonight. I was eating cinnamon icecream and thought about how much fun it would be to sit and eat it with you while we laugh and talk about how it is medicine. “We do not remember days; we remember moments”
~Cesare Pavese
The Burning Brand
I’m hoping that from your last thought Uncle Doug, that you are telling me that my family has my back 100 % no matter what. But what I get from your last thought is that my family doesn’t think I know what I’m doing or what I want. I hope that isn’t the case. No one has lived my life, I haven’t lived anyone elses. All I need from my family right now is to hear them say they love me and this life changing decision has to be mine and they know that. If I’m making the biggest mistake of my life, it’s mine to make. I have a 14 year old daughter that is the most important person in my life. I haven’t taken this decision lightly. I can see that this is hard for everyone to understand but that’s not really my concern. This isn’t their life it’s mine.
These are words to a song that really relates to my life right now:
“I’ve found you find strength in your moments of weakness
for once I’m at peace with myself; I’ve lived in this place and I know all the faces, each one is different but they’re always the same. They mean me no harm but it’s time that I face it, they’ll never allow me to change-I’m movin on”
I love you all!
I hope I don’t have to walk alone even if I’m walking free! But I will!!
That is exactly what im telling you Mandy, this family has your back 1000%, but if you think this family thinks you dont know what your doing then your wrong. We just want you to know you dont have to do it alone. Our love for you is unconditional, our belief in you has no boundries, and the distance we will walk with you if you need us has no limits.
“The one that is truely free can walk alone, but the one that is alone who walks to be free can never truely be”.
Love you, Uncle Doug
mc says; You are one sick little puppy Mindy, but i love puppies!
Dam cat
Mandy
Too many mountains, and not enough stairs to climb
Too many churches and not enough truth
Too many people and not enough eyes to see
Too many lives to lead and not enough time
It’s too late
She’s gone too far
She’s lost the sun
She’s come undone
I’ve come undone-so have you-I think. I feel good, do you?
I feel really good Ang, thanks!
LOVE MY ANGELS
As bonding angels circle in the freedom of love,
With twisted legs held tight,
As trembling hands on in the clouds above,
Circling the darkness of the night.
As freedom walks through unclear tears,
With angels of the light.
As mothers cry and fathers cheer,
the child is held in the night.
As morning dawns without the fear,
in the birth of a perfect love.
With shy bowed heads shrouded in hair,
Sweet bonding angels dance above.
Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash
- Leonard Cohen
LOVE ALWAYS
mc says
kittens are pretty
kittens are sweet
kittens love canary feet.
Dam stupid cat, wants that published!
Mandy,
I can hear in your words just how strong you are right now. You are on a path that is headed towards greatness no matter what the outcome. You are on a search of self discovery and that is never wrong. We make decisions in our life that may hurt some and inspire others, but they are our decisions to make and the outcome will always be just as it is suppose to be. Perfect.
Afew post back Mindy spoke of her father as a philosopher, it stimulated an interest in the great philosophers of history since the death of Jesus. I was amaze by some of the things I read by Plato and st Augustine, Socrates, but it was a letter writtin to arostaoles student Alexander the great that made me relize that even the grat thinkers the amazing minds that were devoted to the truth of life, the reason of life, and the mystery of god, could miss the the simple and perfect truth of god that was always in there heart, and never in there brilliant minds. This letter will be a little long winded but worth your time to read.
________Aristotle: Born 384 -322 B.C.
Birth: Chalcidice, Greece. Death: Chalcis, Greece.
When the great philosopher Aristotle was old, he sent the following letter to his student, Alexander the Great:
“Blessed be He who opens the eyes of the blind, and shows sinners the true path. Let Him be praised in an appropriate manner; since I do not know how to praise Him for the great kindness and mercy, which He showed me. I am eternally grateful to Him, for getting me away from the foolishness to which I had devoted my life.
All my life I delved into philosophy, to explain all natural phenomena in a logical manner. I wrote many books on these subjects. Finally, in the twilight of my life, I had the opportunity to engage in a conversation with a Jewish sage. It did not take me long, to recognize his great wisdom; and he led me to understand, how great is the Torah, that was given on Mount Sinai.
He taught me the inner depth of the Torah, providing me with many brilliant insights based on its teachings. I realized how foolish I had been for not realizing, how G-d can manipulate the laws of nature; and that much of what happens in the world, is directed by G-d.
Realizing all this, I decided to devote myself to exploring the wisdom of the Torah. It did not take me long to realize, that the Torah is based on true foundations, while the axioms of philosophy are purely arbitrary.
__________
Therefore, my dear student Alexander, if I had the power to collect all the books I have written, I would burn them. I would be embarrassed for any of them to survive. However, I realize that I do not have this power; my books have already been published, and have spread all over the world. I also realize, that I will receive Divine punishment, for having written such misleading books.
Therefore, my son, Alexander, I am writing this letter to tell you, that the great majority of my theories regarding natural law, are false. While nature does exist, G-d is the Lord of the universe, and He directs all things as He sees fit. I am telling everyone openly, that they should not waste time with my books. They should not look at them, or even touch them with their hands. It is sinful to waste time, on the false theories that I have espoused.
I feel, that I have saved my soul by admitting my error; I hope that I will not be held guilty for the past, since I acted out of ignorance. But now I have revealed to the public that I was mistaken, and that my heart aches for the time I have wasted, on my foolish theories. Those who waste time on my books therefore, will deserve to be punished.
The Jewish scholar with whom I spoke, showed me the book of Proverbs (Mishley), written by King Solomon, one of the greatest geniuses of all times. The scholar showed me, that in many places, King Solomon warned against wasting time on philosophical speculation.
One such place is where he said, “Say to Wisdom, ‘You are my sister,’ and consider understanding your relative. That they may keep you from strange woman, from the loose woman who speaks so smoothly” (Proverbs 7:4,5).
___________
I feel sorry for my eyes for what they have seen, and my ears for what they have heard. I feel sorry for my body, for wasting its strength on such detrimental studies.
I know that you praise me, and tell me, that I am famous all over the world because of the books I have written. People speak very highly of me. But I wish I were dead, because of the misleading books that I have spread all over the world.
People who devote themselves to the Torah, will earn eternal life; while those who devote themselves to my books, will earn the grave. But I am prepared to accept upon myself, the punishment of them all.
____________
I did not write to you earlier, because I was afraid that you would be angry with me, and perhaps even harm me. But now, I have made up my mind to tell you the truth. I know, that by the time you receive this letter, I will already be dead and buried, because I realize that my end is near.
I salute you with greetings of peace, Alexander of Macedon, great emperor and ruler.”
Your teacher,
Aristotle
_______________________
_______________
I was amazed to think that such a brilliant mind, a dedicated mind to the truth of the universe would take its last breath never feeling, never knowing, never trusting a of God love and die only knowing a punishing God. A God he feared.
I am amazed that a boy who said winshiper instead of windshield wiper walked bravely into the everlasting light of love without any fear.
There is a new world coming, because the light that has been kept under the basket of mans mind has been seen in the hearts of man and will shine brighter and brighter till its radiance is felt by all.
Love Doug
MC IS WALKIN AROUND WITH A DEW RAG AND SUNGLASSES ON SAYING HES GONNA BE A RAPPER CAT AND SINGING:
i slam my cat on da steets of crack
i boogie my babies til da cant come back
teachin my truth wit a back hand slap
kissin my kitten wit da lips of smack
I need help help here! IS THERE A 48 PAW STEP PROGRAM?
DAM CAT
Greatness is in the mind, discovery is in the heart, and the truth of it will be perfect.
love Doug
I HAVENT LIVED ANYONE ELSE’S LIFE…. humm yah think? Audrey spent years in africa helping the oppressed.. did she live anyone else’s life? Mindy was touched by the truth of a fathers heart.. did she live anyone elses life?
I walk in the wake of a beauty i never saw by a brother i never felt, am i living anyone else’s life?
OUR LIVES ARENT MADE IN A MOMENT OF OUR MINDS, BUT CAN BE TOUCHED BY A MOMENT IN OUR HEARTS.
You are living everyone’s lives once your heart discovers the truth.
LOVE ALWAYS
MC has mices snapping picture like poparotsie, he says hes going to tour australia cause they got lots of mices.
I’m so not gonna miss him
Dam cat
The youth dont trust the truth of the aged. They dont think we feel the way they do. They believe there feeling have never been felt, and they think the aged wont understand.
The youth see the slow and considered thought of the aged as a weakness. They believe we dont understand, and they react with the same mistakes we have made.
The youth walk with the confidence we teach them, lacking the wisdom we didn’t know. The youth walk with a strength the aged gave them, but lacking a truth we didn’t know, and know cant teach, because we are the aged, the untrusted.
The youth walk to be the aged.. the untrusted.. and only then to they know the truth.
love the truth
MC SAYS: The cringe of freezing nights, the curl of protected need, the bowed head tucked in the belly, is only felt by the tail of truth.
dam cat is lacing mice tails with colombian hashish.
Angels of beauty, circle my heaven twirling and twisting, dancing to the center of my cloud. Angels of beauty wiggle and want and scream with silent tears, and cry out loud. Angels of beauty wonder and reach to taste the flower they seek. ANGELS OF BEAUTY HEARING the roar missing the love in the center of there dance floor.
love Doug
MC has 17 mices singing kum bye ya, and then going right into we are the world.. I cant take it much longer…
im settin cat traps tonight
Dam cat
PERFECT STARS
thirst untouched by desert heat
tears dried in the sand
baby’s love hearts cant meet
the failure of a man
wishes of forgiveness in nightmares
woken in silent screams
beaten by the truth of your fears
dreading tomorrow’s dreams
the touch of a son in a moment
wasting a lifetime in pain
begging for atonement
walking an angry mind nearly insane
curious suns of false truth sucking your breath
walking in your mind with tantalizing lies
killing a heart between life and death
leaving only crystal tears of your cries
BRING IT ON BONY LEGS.. YOUR PRETTY BUT IM PRETTIER
love the master of poetry
I be DOUG
mc says: im the coolest human that ever mastered a cat.
gezz his dumb ass only has had one master!
dose cat tast like chichen, i need A DISH FOR CHRISMAS EVE.
Dam cat
To those out there who are searching for their true identity I want to share these quotes.
“When we cannot bear to be alone, it means we do not properly value the only companion we will have from birth to death”
~Eda Leshan
“We don’t know who we are until we see what we can do.”
~Martha Grimes
are you a Socrates, are you a Plato, are you Aristotle, are you a St augustine, dose your mind want to understand the minds of all other minds? IS IT YOUR LIFE NEED TO KNOW OTHERS? IS IT IMPORTANT THAT ALL OTHERS KNOW YOU? Do you believe that you will find what your looking for your mind, or in the minds of others? if you do you are like all the other great philosophers, except for a bro of mine that looked beyond mans mind and saw there hearts like the greatest philosopher dose, God is waiting to teach you, hes a bit aged, but he is patient to.
love Doug
MC is begging me for the last word, he has removed his dew rag and sunglasses, and on his knees, asking for a chance to share the truth of life. So ill give him one more chance cause i love him.
MC SAYS: The blood tasted by the hearts of the fearless is sweet, and the blood tasted by those whimpering in fear is bitter. I cry for both, but i only respect the fearless.
he is a braveheart, and that will be the last word….
IF YOU SHOVE AN ICE PIC IN A CATS EAR WILL PETA SAY THATS INHUMAIN? His bony ass is dancing around getting the mices to call him MC THE GREAT.
I’m done with cats, I’m buying a turtle.
The fear of the meek, cry of the weak, will find there strength, in the heart they seek.
love always
Ive walked with Paul, i shivered in revelations, ive questioned my image in genesis, ive danced with the poems psalms, and i have concluded the proverbs and laws have been fulfilled were dose a bony ass like mine walk from here? Who’s hand will guide me? Do you think I’m walking alone? do YOU THINK I KNOW HOW TO WALK ALONE? do YOU THINK IM FREE TO WALK ALONE, OR do you think i walk alone to be free. humm the aged .. they are slow to think, but sure in there thought.
I will give my angels some truth, i have walked free all my whole life. i have sat on bar stools and by beautiful lonely souls, and shared the same heart you hear. i have danced between there pain and mine in an unending dance. i heard there pain and they heard mine, as we share our unending desire for it to end. I had a good mind and heart i never felt, and i left most feeling better then i meet them, but i walked away alone.
That’s why this aged mind and heart can tell you ‘The one alone that walks to be free will never be’.. i dont pull shit outta my ass kids ive danced em.
wiggle your walk, trust your talk, but bet ur sweet ass on the words from my bar stool, i know how to walk alone, but i walk with you.
dance me through the panic till iam safely gathered in
dance me to the end of love
love uncle Doug
I dont think there is one thing in this life that is about you or how you feel that will make a fuckin bit of difference to god. I dont think there is a fuckin thing about what you want, or what you lost that will change the next step in you life. i dont think there is a goddamn thing you can do to change what your life will be.. till you feel God in your heart then you ll dance with a love of a God that even feels a heart like mine.
wow how crazy is that
love
Who said all this crap, i have hered it come from the bar stool next to me!
1.I have always been there for you, and I always will be.
2.I will walk with you forever—-just the two of us.
3.I will always understand you.
4.I will always be kind to you.
5.You will always be my own personal concern.
6.I love you. I always have, and I always will.
OH GOD DID, with a truth you wont walk away alone with.
love ya bro
mc says: my master deserves a day of vacation…
i love that cat
that will be the last word…. see ya Monday Andy
love always
holly crap im on vacation, i wish i knew some really good religious shit i could bury my angels in guilt with, but ive ruined them in the trust of a GOD THAT wont burn there nasty asses, so i guess ill say goodnight, to the beauty that god created the earth for(that he so loves).
goodnight my friends
Hi Doug
Have just been reading some of your thoughts about MC and thoughts by MC.
LOL
I love that cat.
Julia
I just want it to be 70 comments or someone may b offended.
Is there a darkness in you that leaves you empty to feeling the love of God?
One of my angels with tears in her eyes said these words to me, ” I cant feel the spirit within me anymore”. ” I want to, but I just cant”. ” I try to but its just gone”. “I feel so sad”.
The pain we feel in our minds can leave us feeling a desperate abandonment of the love Jesus has for us. I wounder if Jesus had those same dark moments of feeling abandon as he lingered on that cross?
What i know is that no matter how deep i walk into a cave, no matter how dark it gets, when i choose to walk out, the sun will shine for me, the birds will sing for me, the flowers will bloom for me, and Gods love will be waiting for me.
I talked about the great philosophers from early history, but i didnt talk about those from resent history. One of the most beautiful woman to ever walk this earth has to be Mother Teresa, but even Mother Teresa felt the darkness of the night.
This is one of her letters.
Excerpts from Mother Teresa’s letters: Lord, my God, who am I that You should forsake me? The Child of your Love, and now become as the most hated one, the one You have thrown away as unwanted, unloved. I call, I cling, I want, and there is no One to answer, no One on Whom I can cling, no, No One. Alone. Where is my Faith - even deep down right in there is nothing, but emptiness & darkness. My God, how painful is this unknown pain. I have no Faith. I dare not utter the words & thoughts that crowd in my heart & make me suffer untold agony.
I am told God loves me and yet the reality of darkness & coldness & emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul. Did I make a mistake in surrendering blindly to the Call of the Sacred Heart?
Please pray specially for me that I may not spoil His work and that Our Lord may show Himself - for there is such terrible darkness within me, as if everything was dead. It has been like this more or less from the time I started “the work.” - 1953, to Archbishop Ferdinand Perier
Let the son dry your eyes, My sweet angel, your father is waiting with a smile.
Love Doug
M@…hilarious!
Very well said Doug. I often forget that Jesus, himself felt abandoned by God, saying, My God, My God, Why have thou forsaken me? So, that tells me we’re actually in pretty good company when we feel abandoned by Him but, if, like Jesus, we can say not my will but thine be done, thats the tough part for me but the times I’ve been able to do just that, I’ve never regreted it. I know for me, I’m so much about what I want at the moment that sometimes I let that cloud my judgement. I’m 50 years old and just now beginning to realize that what I feel at any particular moment is NOT the most important thing in the universe. It’s very difficult for me to not always act on all of my feelings but to trust in Him that His way and will is what is best for me because He created me and loves me and knows me better than I know myself.
I have so many questions, and so few answers. I feel embarrassed at times with my ignorance, and frustrated other times. There is a part of me that thinks maybe id be better off if i would show up tomorrow morning at some church, any church, and sit quietly and listen. There is a part of me that would love to have someone give me the answers to my questions, but i just dont want answers.
As i walk my path looking for the truth, I know it would be better to die never knowing God then to live never knowing the truth of God. So as much as i want for answers, i will be content to wait for the truth in the questions i seek.
I’m still wondering around in the beginning of my creation. I didn’t know what the US in let us make them meant. It took a couple of weeks for me to figure out the us is THE FATHER, THE SON, AND THE HOLLY GHOST. To show you how ignorant i am, i must explain that once i new that simple thing that I’m sure most of you knew, then i had to try and understand what a holly ghost is. It didn’t sound like something i would want in my bedroom at night, but i began to understand that the holly ghost… the holly spirit is that beautiful thing in me that lets me feel peace love joy
I wont sit in anybody’s pew, and wait for just any answer, but i will continue to look for the truth in all my questions.
Galatians 5:22-23
22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
THATS WAT IM TALKIN ABOUT!
Love the truth..
Doug
OMG, that stupid cat sees my frustration in my ignorance of the gospel and is parading around dressed like the Pope talking crazy crap in cat Latin.
I’m going to start reading that stuff out of the bible on circumcision to him!
Dam cat
How would you answer this question?
If you could change anything from the first moment of life would you?
Doug
What would you do for your father? When i was a young man, every summer i would find a job. I was taught that if i accepted a job you would give an hours work for an hours pay, and you would work within the rules of my employer unless the conditions were unsafe or immoral.
One summer i took a job with a company call Guaranty auto co., They soled everything from tricycles to little red wagons, and my job was to stock and to assemble all these different toys.
I was a good employee, but one day my father told me on a Thursday that i would need to tell my boss that i would have to leave my scheduled shift two hours early the next day.
I informed my boss on that Fri morning that i had to leave at 3:00, his response was your scheduled till five, and if you leave early your fired.
I said ok, and i work with the same diligence’s i had always worked with, and at 3:00 i walked out the front door and got in my fathers car.
I was fifteen years old when i was fired from my first job for obeying my father. A lesson that i was taught that i didn’t really understand, till i was 60 years old.
What would you do for your Father, what laws of man hold you from doing it?
Love always
MC SAYS: Its better to say a 1000 hail Mary’s mother of Mice, then to use a cats name in vein and say holly crap that catdamm coyote has my tail.
Im tellin ya I cant take it, he is wearin that little pointy hat, and white robes.
maybe if i shoot him with a siver bullet..god help me
Dam cat
Where should i go next in my journey? There is a part of me that says… Ya know Doug you got grace what more do you need to know?
Well that’s the great thing about my travels, i dont need to know anything, but i want to know some more stuff. Just like God, he didn’t need me, he just wanted me.. so sweet.
were should i go next, were will i find more to love… any suggestions, or do i need to keep walking alone?
Love Doug
MC SAY: As long as there are red birds in the trees, as long as there are gophers in the grass, as long as you can feel whiskers on your cheek, a purr in your lap, you will never walk alone.
crazy catdamm cat! I cant help but love him..
Dam cat
When you know you don’t know, then you know. I hope I’m learning till the day I die! Luv ya cuz
Alabama—SEC CHAMPS—ROLL TIDE ROLL!!
As angels circle and swirl holding hands, sharing a love, As hearts dance as one, As angels offer comforting confusion, in twined legs, as hearts offer truth as one, leaving the lonely to walk alone.
love always
love the tide cuz
Time to share the names of my angels, my BGs.
#1 BG …bony legs
#2 BG …snorter
#3BG ….freakin farter
#4BG….mad cat
#5BG … performer
#6BG….comander
#7bg…..sweet love
ya gotta love em
love uncle doug
can i get a hiya, from my BGs?
MC says: when you’ve danced your dance, and you’ve looked down the road as far as you can see, when you’ve touched all you can touch, and felt all you can feel, when you’ve cried all your going to cry, and waited for the hiya you’ll never hear, when you know its time to sleep the long sleep, and walk in the silence of your heart, you will walk alone in the silence of love.
My bgs no i wont let MC have the last word, but they know ive wanted to say goodbye to BG for or a while. Ive danced for my brother, and i have danced for my girls, and i have danced for myself.
Im not leaving my bgs, im not leaving my sweet sis, im not leaving my brother, im just going where i can be me, touch me, feel me, like i have always done for a life time.. dance your dance, trust your heart.
love Doug
Doug,
You go where you need to go. I understand and I am sure everyone else does as well. My Father is so proud of you and what you have brought to Bold Grace. You have inspired, you have loved with all of yourself and you have taught me personally to not be afraid and I can’t thank you enough for that. I need to touch on one thing that you asked and that was:
“If you could change anything from the first moment of life would you?”
My answer will always be no, I would never change one single moment because each moment has taught me something new about myself and those moments have allowed to me to continue to grow and share myself with others.
I still wish I could sit face to face with my Dad and he could share with me what he knows now, but then I would miss out on my own experiences and the joy of discovering it on my own. I don’t want to know now what my daughter is going to be when she grows up I just simply want to watch her grow.
Love you Uncle Doug
In an answer to your question about changing anything from the first moment of life: I wouldn’t change a thing either. I was asked if I could go back 20 years and do things different, would I? At that moment I said yes, but I am realizing now that maybe that would have saved the pain of today (who really knows) but I would have missed some very important and special moments in my life that have made me who I am today. You can’t go back and you cant change the past you can only direct your future by the decisions you make in the present.
Oh and by the way I think you have BG#3 and BG#4 mixed up!!