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Peace
Geo
If any of you that read BoldGrace.com are on FACEBOOK and we are not yet friends on Facebook look me up.
Just search for: Geo Howell
And request to be added as friend.
Peace
Geo
Thirty five years ago i walked out the back door of my home, sat on the ground with a piece of scrap paper and wrote a poem to the son i thought i would never know. The words made no since to me, but i knew i was speaking from the deepest part of my heart. They ask that i would know when the right time comes, they told me that the children are the glue. They said the sun will rise but i will need the night, but then it ask the question, is my life’s search for the sun?, or for what is not done. It reminds me of the moment of birth and death at one time, and leaves me with these final words.
I miss my first son.
I never wrote another poem for thirty five more years.
There are lies along the road that we all must hear,bear, and fear, but we can rest beneath his smile. It is a short piece of time we live in, and we cant afford to let it pass us by, and i think there is a hand we can hold that dosent need the night.
For the past thirty five years, whenever i was brave enough to read my own poem i would cry, but tonight i read it, and i didnt cry, I knew…
I didnt need to miss my first son…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yNXsWm-vKs
you are not alone on your trip.
love always
I like this one.
John 8
14Jesus answered, “Even if I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is valid, for I know where I came from and where I am going. But you have no idea where I come from or where I am going. 15You judge by human standards; I pass judgment on no one. 16But if I do judge, my decisions are right, because I am not alone. I stand with the Father, who sent me. 17In your own Law it is written that the testimony of two men is valid. 18I am one who testifies for myself; my other witness is the Father, who sent me.”
What im hearing is you and your priest deacon preacher can say all the crap you want to but the words of God are all i need to hear. Me and him alone. Pretty cool huh.
love Doug
As you try and live this life for the next one your better off to say fuck this one, and feel the next one. No man will tell you that, but your heart will.
love always
I dont know if Jesus drank or not, but God knows some of his diciples did, and heaven knows they needed to. I mean come on this shit is crazy.
We are told to believe and we will have everlasting life, but not one person in 2000 years has been able to confirm that. WE ARE TOLD TO LISTEN TO OUR HEARTS AND ALL THAT gOD KNOWS WILL BE SHOWN TO US, but not one man knows it.
We are told all kinds of crap, but why should we believe any of it.
WHICH PARTS OF IT MAKES YOUR LIFE BETTER?
Im sitting here to night thinking i can look in my heart and give you that answer, but the only answer i feel is a blank. So blank.
I have lived a life of man hateing phony, and i dont want to be part of it, but i really want to know JESUS. Maybe its time for me to sleep again.
Doug
MC SAYS: I can put a paw on a frozen pond and know ill fall through it if i try and walk across it, I can look at a fence and know its to high for me to jump, I can feel the strength of a tom cat and know the fear to run, but my master dosent seem to know when to stop, or how high he can jump, and he seems to have no fear.
How many layers of chocolate do you need to dip a cat in before you can hide him on Easter?
Dam cat
It wont matter how deep the ice, nor how tall your wall, and you wont run from any of your wooly buggers, because you know there is more.
love always
What is FaceBook? Have you already read it? Who is the author?
Have you ever been told that you have to read the bible and understand it base on the context of JESUS environment at the time?
Wow, now that’s bullshit. I guess he was only talking to a few hundred people right, or we need to believe he was talking to there hearts that couldnt understand him.
Why would God send him to just talk to them. Since they didnt understand him anyway.
There is not a word out of his mouth that was spoken for them not for you to hear. He dont care about the audience of the time, but the heart that hears it for all eternity
yaeh see, he didnt give a shit about the Pharisees the Jews the chistians, he cared about the hearts of all mankind , the children of his father. STOP THE GAME IN YOUR MIND.
Every other verse in your bible says that to them me and to you when you hear it with your heart.
love always
WHEN ONE PERSON CAN GIVE ME ONE REASON WHY THY ARE LOVED BY GOD MORE THAN ANYONE, I WILL KISS MC, and never speak again.
Doug
Jesus dance took him to a treacherous cross with his Dad sending him there so that all of us could have grace, and for thousands of years we didnt hear what he did. Then some began to listen beyond there minds and said this ain’t right, but they only began to listen, and they dance between the moments of there hearts and the lies of there minds, and there minds tell them they know enough, but they will only know enough when they hear beyond there ears.. crazy huh
Doug
The separation between you body ad your mind is like the separation of earth and grass. The separation between your mind and heart is like the separation of earth and heaven.
DOUG
you can dance in mans world and die in it, or lieve in Gods.
love always
YOU HEARD ME RIGHT I SAID YOU WILL DIE IN ANS WORLD
MANS
READ YOUR BIBLE in the context of your heart, with the same truth of your heart. put yourself on the cross with your brother, and feel your father.
my year is coming to a close.
THERE IS MORE TO MY MIND THEN YOU CAN IMAGINE.
GN
Seems like the number seven is an important number. The first words in the bible have seven words, the rainbow has seven colors. All of our music is based on seven notes, but all I can think about right know is that my dad said if you want something clean wash it seven times.
love always
My year is almost over, and its like im easing my foot on to the brake. I have looked between teardrops and seen the beauty of raindrops. I have stared and the sun and cursed its brilliance, but continued to walk in the darkness of my clouds.
I only seek the truth, and i stumbled tripped and fell drunkenly at its feet over and over, but i walked on with dried salty tears on my cheeks. I left the embodiment of sanity to walk beyond what my mind said to go, and i did it without fear.
I made a promise. To myself because of a brothers eyes.
The dance was was worth it Cliffy.
love Doug
MC SAYS: It was not easy for me either, I dressed as MC Hammer, and was a student of Buddhism, I loved a chicken.. that didnt love me, i lied to my master and tried to control him. I walked a slippery slop between man and truth, but always found a lap of love, so i wont be putting any brakes on soon.
How many dog votes dose it take to appropriate cats as a dog food heath care benefit?
Dam cats
Atonement cool word, but do you know wat it means,,,… I bet our saying i can tell you, but for a year you havent told me crap. So at the end of my year i walk away with what is in my heart, thanks to your fearful heart.
love Doug
1 Corinthians 1:27 (New International Version)
27But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong.
hum, was he talking to your dumb ass, or mine?
love Doug
As my journey ends, I know that my brother wanted me to see you as God dose, and God knows i tried, but all i saw was minds that didnt even come close to Gods, or at least what i saw as God.
I saw denial, anger, indifference, and felt hope, need, and lose, and heard fear of truth, but i danced on, and on.
I gave you a simple mind that only wanted to share one wisdom, “that God loves all of us”, and i said if you believe that then you will never die.
love DOUG
through out the bible God never choose the first born, the intellectual, the prominent, the spiritual, to send his message, he chose the weak.
how bout that
love DOUG
Can i play with your mind… you f,uckin betya i can, can i play with your heart, not a f,uckin chance.
God
i dont think my dance can end where i thought it would. It began staring into the eyes of a man, but i think it will end with me staring into the heart of love, a love only seen by the heart, a love i never knew
LOVE ALWAYS.
Is there any part of you that says i want to look in DOUGS eyes and dance a year knowing what he looked for?..SCARY HUH.
well its a dance worth walking to the center of the dance floor to know.
DOUG
OK, I’m dabbling in revelations again, its a place that came close to leaving me in a fear i said i would not feel, and with that thought in mind i have began to read it again with the belief that i need not fear a God of love. This time I am trying to understand it with the wisdom in my heart, and not the knowledge of my mind.
So as i do this i am asking you to help me through this part of my journey, and maybe both of us will be wiser.
What do you think this means?
Revelation 21
The New Jerusalem
1Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.
My heart tells me that either all the words in the bible are worthy of learning from or none of them are. Either all the words were spoken for all to hear(past present and future) or none of them were, and as we help each other understand them the truth of them will be known in the wisdom of our hearts, and can only be felt wrong in the lies of our mind. Were we not forgiven of sin, and alowed to live in Grace so that we can do that?
Will you please speak to me from your heart?
Peace and Love
Doug
Revelation 11:14 (New International Version)
14The second woe has passed; the third woe is coming soon.
woe we really gotta talk.
love Doug
Somebody is keepin sumthin from me. write it down if you know the answer.
Revelation 10:4 (New International Version)
4And when the seven thunders spoke, I was about to write; but I heard a voice from heaven say, “Seal up what the seven thunders have said and do not write it down.”
dam. curious minds want to know.
love always
My dad told me when i was very young that if was ever surrounded by Indians to act crazy because they respected the spirits they didnt understand, that they would dance in a circle around me at a distance, but never harm me because they would know my spirit was special.
I thought my dad was talking about crazy white men and the culture of Indians, but as i dance crazy I see you dance at a distance to me with a respect you dont understand.
I believe i have waked to the center of the dance floor as the bride, and i wonder who dances crazy around me.
There is a part of me that knows that im scaring the pants off those that love me, and disgusting those that dont, but in either case i dont care.
I WIL NOT STOP SENDING THE SAME MESSAGE, that God loves you unconditionally equally and limitless if you love him, but i think there is an if because he cant feel your mind.
love Doug
You think i was trained for this God dam dance?
He who has ears, let him hear.
DOUG
You guys have heard me for a year, what are you scared of, why wont you talk to me, you know i love all equally, and i just want all to feel what i feel, am i wrong?
How long will you dance in a circle around Cliffs brother?
DANCIN CRZY FOR YOU BRO.
DOUG
Its easy to say screw all the words, i have heard enough, and i will only listen to the ones that ease my mind, but if you listen to them with your heart then all sing the song you want to hear.
Open your heart.
Doug
I am not special, i am so less then special, but there is such a desire to say something to you that is more then i feel worthy to share, but i think you hear me, even without words.
I love God in my heart. I NEVER KNEW HIM IN MY MIND. i couldnt know him there. I KNEW MAN THERE.
I dont think God can know you if your love for him is in your mind. Its not that he dosnt love you, he just wont know you.
Doug
Its not over guys, read with your heart.
Doug
before you ask me what about Doug, ask yourself are you asking from your heart, or your mind.
There is a beautiful thing coming, and it will be known by all that love GOD, BUT TOUCHED ONLY BY TRUE LOVE. The kind of love you saw with the first tulip through the last snow. The love you’ve you felt at the break of dawn. The beauty you saw in a starlet night. The love you have whispered in your poems and prays, and painted on your canvas, AND THE TRUTH YOU FELT FROM BIRTH.
As the world dances on there is a part of me that wants to think that jesus stands in the center of our dance floor and cries for all that circle him, but my heart tells me he circles our dance floor from within us and only smiles on the hearts that dance to the end of his love.
This is so hard but im dancing to a place that I am going to put one hand(with seven knuckles) between me and man, and the other hand (with seven knuckles) on my heart.
I know you dont understand, and niether do i, but its all good if you have your hand on your heart.
Doug
THERE IS MORE TO COME GUYS.
It is scary to think that all the earth and heaven will fade away and all of mankind that dosent love God will also die,and all that never loved him will stay dead, but truth is truth, and once you know there is a new heaven and earth coming if you know Gods love, and he feels yours, its ok.
Doug
My belief is based on nothing man has ever said, and it might even be different from the brothers eyes that sent me on this journey, but the words are from my heart, and not from mans mouth.
Doug
For a year i have tried to understand the bible. I READ IT. I RESEARCHED IT, and i was left confused, conflicted and consumed by what i thought i knew, but it was when i said ill let the part of me that wasn’t owned by man hear it that i began a dance for you, and i knew you heard a crazy guy, but i knew that some would hear a heart.
ITS NOT EASY TO SPREAD YOUR WINGS TO MAN, but its easier then turning your back to God.
Doug
I wanted to think because i could hold everyone’s hand on earth that i would hold everyone’s hand in heaven, but i think the only hands i will hold in heaven are those that feel Gods hand.
ITS NOT A MATTER IF YOU WILL DIE guys, its a matter if you will live.
Doug
I know im going on and on tonight, and i feel there is a purpose to my elaboration. It is almost a desperation to tell you something that i feel you haven’t heard ,a want, a cry, for you to listen beyond your mind. Beyond mans mind.
and i know you will discount it as crazy.
Doug
There are so many of you that have stayed in your churches of comfort, and so many that have walked away to there places of comfort, and all love God in there mind, a place he will not feel.
love Doug
these are harse words i am saying, but they come frome my heart.
start over,, read with your heart.
love
I think it is time for us to know that Gods heart is wide, but there is a reason he knows he will only need a narrow gate. Its not because he will judge your sin, f,uck that already done, its because you dance in your mind with them, as you love him, but never know him, because you live with him in your mind, once you step in your heart you will know a god that loves beyond anything man can love.
It is the image we were made in, but the mysteries of his truth are yet to be reveled.. the third woe.
and its all good.. nothing to fear.. look in your heart.. he who has ears, let him hear.
Doug